Wednesday 10 May 2017
The art of this nerd. . .
So here I am thinking and wondering, and after a conversation with a work colleague not to long ago I thought it might be interesting to post some of my artsy type stuff. It's only a short blog, but sometimes there's not a lot of free time in this weird and wonderful world of a nerd ....Enjoy
Friday 24 March 2017
It's been a few years ...
So it's been a few years since I was here last, and I was going to leave it as a failed experiment to become a blogger, but recently I've been thinking of a lot of things including this blog. Recent events have also made me think of things that need to be said.
A lot has changed, relationships, where I'm living, career and many other things but I doubt I will go into that now.
The wonderful world of a nerd changes often, sometimes subtly other times with a foundation shaking earthquake and thats whats happened recently. Right now I'm standing outside CAFOD in waterloo and today the streets of London seem somewhat more relaxed... no relaxed is the wrong word, more...subdued. In the last few minutes alone I've seen several unmarked police cars wailing and screeching along the streets, people are more sombre. One gentleman even came up and hugged me on the underground saying "I'm sorry for what you have all faced".
The news has been awash with what recently transpired in Westminster, the news tells us it was terrorist action, an attack on democracy or a man who lost his mind.
I've been trying to get it all straight in my mind and with the attitude of everyone in England today, in the UK be they foreign or uk born and the sombre atmospher i would have to agree with all the various news articles. It does feel like an attack on democracy, it does feel like a terrorist act. And I'm left just as ambivilant as I was yesterday. I dont know how to or what I should be feeling at a time like this, although having said that... I just turned onto Westminster Bridge and the firt thing I see is parliment house. The bridge is busy, but somehow not as busy as it usually is at 1pm. Helicopters still flying a vigil, police officers walking the beat across the bridge and things are quiet.
Flowers line the railings, news crews shooting b roll, people huddled together sobbing. If I had to choose a piece of music to mark what today and the last few days have felt like in the city or at least my own feelings I would have no other choice than to say the red weed or dead london from Jeff Waynes The War Of The Worlds.
It's strange to be walking here, there's a feeling that things aren't quite the same and in reality they aren't. Even with the phorensic tents abscent, car wreckage now gone and blood stains no longer visible it all feels so fresh as if it only just happened and not a few days ago.
It's sometime later now, I shed my tears while gazing down at the Thames, said my silent prayers and thoughts as I looked up at Parliment House and the tower which holds a national symbol, the guilded cage of big ben which still trikes faithfully every quarter hour and on the hour and contemplated the future as I gazed at the union flag at half mast in remberance.
I guess I finally truly know why I made one choice that I did. As I said at the start there had been a lot of changes even in career and one choice was to join the Army Reserve, to train to be a reservist and today it really hit me. Watchi g the flag flutter in the breeze of the day, words like Terrorist attempt, unity, democracy still swimming in my thoughts it came to me, hit me like a ton of bricks as to why I joined the Reserves, its so things like this cant happen on a wider scale, its so we dont see out version of 9/11 its to protect those that need protecting and to protect our way of life.
Am I saddened by what has happened ? Of course. Do I feel a sense of duty to protect not only my country but the ones I love ? Yes.
Many things change, even myself and I dont often make sense and maybe I dont know but I felt the need to say what I have no matter how disjointed. The people of London, the UK and the world will move on from this and it will be another moment in history where something bad happened and the world came together no matter how briefly but for me....
...for me it will be a day when i looked at a statue of Winston Churchill, cried with the people and got validation in my choices.
Not everyday is a happy one but it was a defining day in the weird and wonderfull world of a nerd.
A lot has changed, relationships, where I'm living, career and many other things but I doubt I will go into that now.
The wonderful world of a nerd changes often, sometimes subtly other times with a foundation shaking earthquake and thats whats happened recently. Right now I'm standing outside CAFOD in waterloo and today the streets of London seem somewhat more relaxed... no relaxed is the wrong word, more...subdued. In the last few minutes alone I've seen several unmarked police cars wailing and screeching along the streets, people are more sombre. One gentleman even came up and hugged me on the underground saying "I'm sorry for what you have all faced".
The news has been awash with what recently transpired in Westminster, the news tells us it was terrorist action, an attack on democracy or a man who lost his mind.
I've been trying to get it all straight in my mind and with the attitude of everyone in England today, in the UK be they foreign or uk born and the sombre atmospher i would have to agree with all the various news articles. It does feel like an attack on democracy, it does feel like a terrorist act. And I'm left just as ambivilant as I was yesterday. I dont know how to or what I should be feeling at a time like this, although having said that... I just turned onto Westminster Bridge and the firt thing I see is parliment house. The bridge is busy, but somehow not as busy as it usually is at 1pm. Helicopters still flying a vigil, police officers walking the beat across the bridge and things are quiet.
Flowers line the railings, news crews shooting b roll, people huddled together sobbing. If I had to choose a piece of music to mark what today and the last few days have felt like in the city or at least my own feelings I would have no other choice than to say the red weed or dead london from Jeff Waynes The War Of The Worlds.
It's strange to be walking here, there's a feeling that things aren't quite the same and in reality they aren't. Even with the phorensic tents abscent, car wreckage now gone and blood stains no longer visible it all feels so fresh as if it only just happened and not a few days ago.
It's sometime later now, I shed my tears while gazing down at the Thames, said my silent prayers and thoughts as I looked up at Parliment House and the tower which holds a national symbol, the guilded cage of big ben which still trikes faithfully every quarter hour and on the hour and contemplated the future as I gazed at the union flag at half mast in remberance.
I guess I finally truly know why I made one choice that I did. As I said at the start there had been a lot of changes even in career and one choice was to join the Army Reserve, to train to be a reservist and today it really hit me. Watchi g the flag flutter in the breeze of the day, words like Terrorist attempt, unity, democracy still swimming in my thoughts it came to me, hit me like a ton of bricks as to why I joined the Reserves, its so things like this cant happen on a wider scale, its so we dont see out version of 9/11 its to protect those that need protecting and to protect our way of life.
Am I saddened by what has happened ? Of course. Do I feel a sense of duty to protect not only my country but the ones I love ? Yes.
Many things change, even myself and I dont often make sense and maybe I dont know but I felt the need to say what I have no matter how disjointed. The people of London, the UK and the world will move on from this and it will be another moment in history where something bad happened and the world came together no matter how briefly but for me....
...for me it will be a day when i looked at a statue of Winston Churchill, cried with the people and got validation in my choices.
Not everyday is a happy one but it was a defining day in the weird and wonderfull world of a nerd.
Thursday 6 November 2014
So it comes to pass ...
.... and it's finally happened ......
J.J Has finally decided it's time that the name of the new Star Wars film is released and ..... I couldn't be less thrilled than if it was named "Jar Jar drink wallpaper paste". So the first film in the new trilogy is to be called "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" .... Really ? the force awakens ? .. Sigh
Now I could understand if this was a prequel going all the way back to the formation of the Jedi, back into the days Pre KOTOR (Knights of the old republic), that I could understand, but this ? ... Yeah, doesn't quite sit well. However I guess we will see what we see. Obviously it's not going to stop me seeing it I mean, come on ... I'm a Star Wars nerd here, Like I'm not going to see it.
In other news, I stumbled across something so amazingly awesome, it feeds into so core needs of mine: Gaming, Collectibles, Nerd & Geek memorabilia. "Where do you find all this in one place ?" I hear you ask, ....... okay well I don't hear you asking anything cause I'm typing it .. obviously ....... but that place is lootcrate.com, and it's AWESOME, its like a subscription magazine service but instead of a glossy pamphlet to read on the toilet you instead get a ... well, Loot box, a box of loot, delivered to your door, once a month with a random selection of stuff inside and it's fantastic, cause it's all highly collectible and mostly random, although everyone will probably get a t-shirt or something but then even that's limited edition to that month. I would say go check them out over at Lootcrate.com or check out some lootcrate unboxing videos on youtube ..... Oh wait, here's one I prepared earlier ... well found with like a 3 second look at youtube ... oh you get the point
And use this code: DOMO to get 10% your first order if you decide to try it ^_^
for now though it's all about Star Wars, and yes .... still killing zombies in DayZ and epic loot from little black boxes, it's all fun in the "Weird and wonderful world of a nerd"
J.J Has finally decided it's time that the name of the new Star Wars film is released and ..... I couldn't be less thrilled than if it was named "Jar Jar drink wallpaper paste". So the first film in the new trilogy is to be called "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" .... Really ? the force awakens ? .. Sigh
Now I could understand if this was a prequel going all the way back to the formation of the Jedi, back into the days Pre KOTOR (Knights of the old republic), that I could understand, but this ? ... Yeah, doesn't quite sit well. However I guess we will see what we see. Obviously it's not going to stop me seeing it I mean, come on ... I'm a Star Wars nerd here, Like I'm not going to see it.
In other news, I stumbled across something so amazingly awesome, it feeds into so core needs of mine: Gaming, Collectibles, Nerd & Geek memorabilia. "Where do you find all this in one place ?" I hear you ask, ....... okay well I don't hear you asking anything cause I'm typing it .. obviously ....... but that place is lootcrate.com, and it's AWESOME, its like a subscription magazine service but instead of a glossy pamphlet to read on the toilet you instead get a ... well, Loot box, a box of loot, delivered to your door, once a month with a random selection of stuff inside and it's fantastic, cause it's all highly collectible and mostly random, although everyone will probably get a t-shirt or something but then even that's limited edition to that month. I would say go check them out over at Lootcrate.com or check out some lootcrate unboxing videos on youtube ..... Oh wait, here's one I prepared earlier ... well found with like a 3 second look at youtube ... oh you get the point
And use this code: DOMO to get 10% your first order if you decide to try it ^_^
for now though it's all about Star Wars, and yes .... still killing zombies in DayZ and epic loot from little black boxes, it's all fun in the "Weird and wonderful world of a nerd"
Tuesday 28 October 2014
Well that was ... Not Nice
So today in the weird but wonderful world of a nerd there I was thinking of what I could do to pass some time. I sat down to read a few chapters of a book (Jurassic Park is still Awesome) and then watched a few episodes of Doctor Who and then decide to do a little lives streaming over on my Twitch.tv channel ... *!Shameless Plug alert!"* twitch.tv/esvakas ... Told ya.
So there I was just about to hit "Start Streaming" when I noticed something was off, everything looked a bit dull, so after about twenty minutes in photoshop I made a nice new overlay for the channel and jumped into some Sniper Elite III, and I was in my "Kill all, leave none alive" mode and channelling the spirit of some of the finest snipers of the last eighty years .... well at least in my mind anyway and so I was in, Time to kill!!!!
I come around the corner of a rock and see a shape vanish into a doorway and follow it, I go in, up the stairs, turn around and he hasn't seen me. He has a buddy on the floor below him, and above him. At this point I'm confident enough to kill this guy with out alerting the other two cause they will just think it's him shooting at some hapless Noob running out in the open, and I was right! and down he goes with a headshot. I go to the bottom level, same thing, another shot to the back of the head, then I climb the ladder and take out the last one. SUCCESS! I think, "The Clock Tower is ours" I call confidently down the Microphone.
Within thirty seconds I'm laying in a pool of blood and the match ends, Someone got a lucky shot off when I poked my head up, but thankfully we won and the timer started to tick down to the next map. And thats when it happened ...
...."You have been removed from the game!" ...
Stunned!, I sit there looking at the screen for several moments wondering why, and I almost tipped into the pool of anger, but shrugged it off voiced a "Meh" and logged out of the game thinking "Well that was ...not nice"
I guess it's just one of those days in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd ....
So there I was just about to hit "Start Streaming" when I noticed something was off, everything looked a bit dull, so after about twenty minutes in photoshop I made a nice new overlay for the channel and jumped into some Sniper Elite III, and I was in my "Kill all, leave none alive" mode and channelling the spirit of some of the finest snipers of the last eighty years .... well at least in my mind anyway and so I was in, Time to kill!!!!
I come around the corner of a rock and see a shape vanish into a doorway and follow it, I go in, up the stairs, turn around and he hasn't seen me. He has a buddy on the floor below him, and above him. At this point I'm confident enough to kill this guy with out alerting the other two cause they will just think it's him shooting at some hapless Noob running out in the open, and I was right! and down he goes with a headshot. I go to the bottom level, same thing, another shot to the back of the head, then I climb the ladder and take out the last one. SUCCESS! I think, "The Clock Tower is ours" I call confidently down the Microphone.
Within thirty seconds I'm laying in a pool of blood and the match ends, Someone got a lucky shot off when I poked my head up, but thankfully we won and the timer started to tick down to the next map. And thats when it happened ...
...."You have been removed from the game!" ...
Stunned!, I sit there looking at the screen for several moments wondering why, and I almost tipped into the pool of anger, but shrugged it off voiced a "Meh" and logged out of the game thinking "Well that was ...not nice"
I guess it's just one of those days in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd ....
Monday 27 October 2014
Welcome one and all back to my world
Welcome one and all back to my world ....
Lets see, the original plan to put up a blog post this last Friday sadly went completely out of the window and unfortunately for a very sad reason. My beloved pet, my pooch Saffi who I had for twelve years sadly had to be put to sleep because in the early hours of that morning she suffered from a massive stroke and after a long night staying up with here and then what seemed to be an even longer conversation with the vet and realising there was nothing that could be done, I had to make the decision. Thankfully she didn't go alone in a corner of the house somewhere only to be found later, I was with her at the end and I was the last thing she saw, even though it did take every ounce of strength I had to put a smile on my face so she didn't see me sad.
It got me thinking about allot of things, especially life and death. In all the nerdy, geeky and probably stupid things I watch, read and play death is a common thing. Die in a game, Simple respawn, Die in a TV Show / Movie and just wait a series or a sequal cause chances are they magically bring the character back. Die in a book they become a hero ..... And we get so desensitised to it in these forms it kind of numbs us to the fact it actually happens, until it does then it hits us like a brick because it's not a game, A TV Show / Movie or a book.
It certainly makes you think .....
I'm going to miss my furry little gaming buddy, the faithful companion who would sit beside me and watch as I slaughtered zombies or saved a galaxy. The self heating foot warmer that would snuggle up to my feet as I lay on the sofa watching Red Dwarf or Star Wars ..... The member of the family who would sit with me and fall asleep on my lap as I was reading a book.
I'm going to miss my best friend
It's not a very happy week, but then not everything can be happy or awesome in the weird and wonderful .. if sad ... world of a nerd
Lets see, the original plan to put up a blog post this last Friday sadly went completely out of the window and unfortunately for a very sad reason. My beloved pet, my pooch Saffi who I had for twelve years sadly had to be put to sleep because in the early hours of that morning she suffered from a massive stroke and after a long night staying up with here and then what seemed to be an even longer conversation with the vet and realising there was nothing that could be done, I had to make the decision. Thankfully she didn't go alone in a corner of the house somewhere only to be found later, I was with her at the end and I was the last thing she saw, even though it did take every ounce of strength I had to put a smile on my face so she didn't see me sad.
It got me thinking about allot of things, especially life and death. In all the nerdy, geeky and probably stupid things I watch, read and play death is a common thing. Die in a game, Simple respawn, Die in a TV Show / Movie and just wait a series or a sequal cause chances are they magically bring the character back. Die in a book they become a hero ..... And we get so desensitised to it in these forms it kind of numbs us to the fact it actually happens, until it does then it hits us like a brick because it's not a game, A TV Show / Movie or a book.
It certainly makes you think .....
I'm going to miss my furry little gaming buddy, the faithful companion who would sit beside me and watch as I slaughtered zombies or saved a galaxy. The self heating foot warmer that would snuggle up to my feet as I lay on the sofa watching Red Dwarf or Star Wars ..... The member of the family who would sit with me and fall asleep on my lap as I was reading a book.
I'm going to miss my best friend
It's not a very happy week, but then not everything can be happy or awesome in the weird and wonderful .. if sad ... world of a nerd
Saffi - 2002 - 2014
Sunday 19 October 2014
A morning in DayZ
So with any normal day comes the usual "What to do today ?" and today was no exception.
On my way home from work I was quietly pondering world domi..... errmm... what plans I had, and I remembered that myself and my angel had decided to play some DayZ and so I figured a gearing run was in order.
For those unfamiliar DayZ is a open world Zombie Horror survival game where you start with nothing but the clothes on your back, a flash light and a battery and ... yeah that's it. So you have to survive a zombie apocalypse with what you can scavenge all the while hoping you aren't disemboweled by a zombie, fed bleach then murdered by a player or freezing to death ... fun
So I met up with a good buddy of mine, and my thinking was, we meet up, kill some zombies, get some good loot then log out for the later afternoon session...... This of course didn't happen. Between Zombies and the elements we both died loosing all out gear ... back to square one it seems.
Guess I will just have to see how the afternoon session goes, after all had death by environment and zombie, perhaps next I will be taken hostage in hand cuffs, fed rotten fruit, given a transfusion of bad blood and then just before the point of death have the last vestige of life beaten out of me with a cattle prod , but I guess this should be expected in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd....
...... welcome to DayZ
On my way home from work I was quietly pondering world domi..... errmm... what plans I had, and I remembered that myself and my angel had decided to play some DayZ and so I figured a gearing run was in order.
For those unfamiliar DayZ is a open world Zombie Horror survival game where you start with nothing but the clothes on your back, a flash light and a battery and ... yeah that's it. So you have to survive a zombie apocalypse with what you can scavenge all the while hoping you aren't disemboweled by a zombie, fed bleach then murdered by a player or freezing to death ... fun
So I met up with a good buddy of mine, and my thinking was, we meet up, kill some zombies, get some good loot then log out for the later afternoon session...... This of course didn't happen. Between Zombies and the elements we both died loosing all out gear ... back to square one it seems.
Guess I will just have to see how the afternoon session goes, after all had death by environment and zombie, perhaps next I will be taken hostage in hand cuffs, fed rotten fruit, given a transfusion of bad blood and then just before the point of death have the last vestige of life beaten out of me with a cattle prod , but I guess this should be expected in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd....
...... welcome to DayZ
Monday 29 September 2014
Rumours of my assimilation are greatly exaggerated ....
Well well well, It's certainly been a while ....
So just what has been happening ? well quite a few things. I did make it to the USA and had a fantastic Christmas there and a brilliant new years, even though I did get stuck a few extra days more than I intended thanks to copious amounts of snow *sigh*. Things got a little busier in both worlds and that kept me away from this little blog but I still remained in weird and wonderful world of a nerd.
Sadly I did see the end of a relationship, it had been fun and amazing but it's with sadness it came to an end, but I wasn't bitter or angry then and I'm still not now, it was an amazing point in my life which I will treasure and a relationship I'm thankful for. Things moved on and we went our separate ways, and I grew from it all and I have to admit I'm a better person today.
Several months later and here I am, I'm in a new relationship and the world of a nerd has never been busier, especially with all the games, books and movies that have been released over the months, everything from new Star Wars books to Destiny & Sniper Elite 3, oh and getting a new job.
I will have to expand on all these in up coming post's, but this one is just to touch base for now and to show the world that I'm back in action and despite the rumours of my assimilation, they have been greatly over exaggerated .
Allot happens in my world, allot fantastic some bad and some just Meh, but will continue to chronicle them here ..... after all no day is the same in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd.
So just what has been happening ? well quite a few things. I did make it to the USA and had a fantastic Christmas there and a brilliant new years, even though I did get stuck a few extra days more than I intended thanks to copious amounts of snow *sigh*. Things got a little busier in both worlds and that kept me away from this little blog but I still remained in weird and wonderful world of a nerd.
Sadly I did see the end of a relationship, it had been fun and amazing but it's with sadness it came to an end, but I wasn't bitter or angry then and I'm still not now, it was an amazing point in my life which I will treasure and a relationship I'm thankful for. Things moved on and we went our separate ways, and I grew from it all and I have to admit I'm a better person today.
Several months later and here I am, I'm in a new relationship and the world of a nerd has never been busier, especially with all the games, books and movies that have been released over the months, everything from new Star Wars books to Destiny & Sniper Elite 3, oh and getting a new job.
I will have to expand on all these in up coming post's, but this one is just to touch base for now and to show the world that I'm back in action and despite the rumours of my assimilation, they have been greatly over exaggerated .
Allot happens in my world, allot fantastic some bad and some just Meh, but will continue to chronicle them here ..... after all no day is the same in the weird and wonderful world of a nerd.
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